And the finalist is...

Everyone who weighed in on the Soulmate Debate was entered into the drawing for the Fool for Romance contest. From those who commented, I chose Jennifer aka Jenny Lowery as the finalist. I sent Jennifer's name and contact info to Crystal Raine, blog coordinator for the tour. At the end of the tour (3/31) Crystal will draw the name of the grand prize winner and runner up prizes. I'll post those names here when I know who the winners are.

Thanks to everyone who participated, and good luck with the drawing, Jenny!

Lilly

The Soul Mate Debate

Do you believe in soul mates? Do you think there’s one perfect person for everyone? That we’re two halves of a separated whole, destined to find our other half? Or do you believe there are endless possibilities when it comes to love and once we find it, it takes two dedicated souls to make it last?

A soul mate is one's other half. That one person who makes us whole--a true companion or lover with whom we are meant to spend our lives.

Another definition of a soul mate is someone with whom we share many experiences in different lifetimes. Soul mates can be friends, siblings, parents, or lovers. But with each relationship, there is a deep and abiding love or a spiritual bond that connects the two in a profound and meaningful way.

My youngest daughter believes a soul mate is that one person who can make you happy and fits perfectly in your life--but it doesn’t always work out. She also believes other people can make you happy without being your soul mate.

It’s an interesting philosophy but I disagree. If you’re happy with someone, why would you not believe he/she is your soul mate if you believe in such things? And if you believe you’ve found your soul mate and it doesn’t work out, are you destined to spend your life alone? Or fake happiness with someone else?

Perhaps my daughter believes in soul mates because she’s grown up with two loving parents who love one another, have always been faithful, and were never married to anyone else. But even loving my husband the way I do, I don’t believe in soul mates. I just don’t think there’s one single person out there specifically designed to “complete” us and make us happy.

Frankly, I don’t think anyone should wait around for another person to make them happy. Happiness comes from within, and if you rely on someone else to make you happy, then you’ll spend the rest of your life blaming someone else for your misery.

No, I don’t believe in soul mates, but I am a romantic. And I believe in love at first sight, happily ever after, and true love.

True love is the kind of love you feel when the person you’re with gives you a confidence you never had before. When you find true love, there isn’t a question. You just know it’s right. You may know it the moment you meet, or it may take a while to develop. But whether it’s love at first sight or a love that grows over time, true love comes from a deep and natural affinity between two people who are compatible spiritually, sexually, and emotionally.

True love lasts a lifetime—until death do you part.

I’ve been happily married for thirty years, but I’d hate to think that if one of us died, the other would be left alone and lonely until death. If I died tomorrow, I’d like to think my husband would eventually find someone else to love the way he’s loved me. Love is too special and too wonderful not to believe in second or even third chances.

1 Corinthians 13

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.

Love never fails.

And for me, believing in true love is more comforting than believing in soul mates.

So, where do you stand on the soul mate debate?

Leaving a comment today could put you in the running to win a Kindle! This post is part of the Fool For Romance Contest. See contest rules at: http://www.crystalrainlove.com/foolforromance.htm.

Looking to update my Website

My website http://www.lillygayle.com/ is awesome. My brother designed it and until recently, managed it. The entire site is dedicated to my first book, Out of the Darkness. It has cool links and character bios and the trailer for OTD opens in its own window with the click of a tab.

My brother is a graphic designer by trade. He's also the father of two young boys, and he and his wife raise vegetables and chickens on their private little farm in rural North Carolina. The man has his hands full. And, I have two more books coming out so my website can no longer be about one book.

Slightly Tarnished is my first historical romance. The British-set tale of an English Earl and an American sea captain's daughter is set to release from The Wild Rose Press www.thewildrosepress.com June 3, 2011.

I also have another historical release, Wholesale Husband. This one is set in New York in the late 1800's. There's no cover or release date yet, but I'm soon going to be very busy adding books to my website. And bless his generous heart, my brother no longer has time to manage my site for free when he has a full time job that pays him to do work like this.

So, I'm going to take the plunge and try building my own website while maintaing a link to the current page my brother built. Anyone have any ideas or suggestions. Or a clue how Go Daddy works? My brother's instructions sounded like so much Greek. And I took Latin in high school.

I feel a headache coming on....

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Love at First Sight- Do you believe it?

Love at first sight seems like such a romantic notion. Gazes meet from across the room and the attraction is so strong both parties know they have to meet. The two cross a crowded room, extending hands, feeling the jolt of desire the moment they touch. Or two people meet for the first time and the attraction is instantaneous. Is it love at first sight? Is it nothing more than sexual attraction?

Or is it more like a possibility of love at first sight?


My mom swears she fell in love with my dad at first sight. It was sometime around 1952 or 53. She lived in Virginia but was visiting her aunt and uncle in North Carolina when she saw my dad working on a car. Actually, he was more or less building a car. It was just a car frame with vinegar jugs for a gas tank and an old sofa for the seats. But the car worked and my mom was impressed. She was 14 and he was 16. He hardly even noticed her.

Then, eighteen months later, my mother dated one of my dad’s friends. They went on several dates and my mom asked her “boyfriend” if they could go on a double date. She asked until the boyfriend finally invited my dad and the girl he was dating. A few months later, my dad was dating my mom and eighteen months or so later, in 1956, my parents were married. This April, they will celebrate their 55th wedding anniversary.

Spring forward to 1979. I came home from college for the weekend and went with my sisters and a friend to a night club in Virginia. We lived in North Carolina, just over the Virginia line. A friend of my sister’s friend asked me to go with her to the bar. And there, I saw this adorable man with dark hair and the most beautiful blue eyes I’d ever seen. The friend of a friend introduced us. And we hit it off immediately. That night, he asked if he could take me home. I replied, “No. I’m driving. But if you really want to know where I live, you can follow me. I live with my family.”

At the time, I thought I was being smart, letting him know I didn’t live alone, but I’d kill my daughters if they ever did anything this stupid. But, Johnny followed me home and even came in the house to meet my mom who was waiting up for my sisters and me. Ironically, Johnny was from the same town in Virginia where my mom grew up and they knew many of the same people. I went on a date with Johnny the next night and eighteen months later, we were married. This June, we will celebrate our 31st wedding anniversary.

So, was it just the possibility of love my mother and I fell in love with? Was it nothing more than sexual attraction? Or was it love at first sight?

I vote for love at first sight. What do you think?

Disecting the Paraprosdokian Sentence with Andris Bear

Ok, I confess, before reading Andris Bear's blog http://andrisbear.blogspot.com/ on paraprosdokian sentences, I'd never heard of them. But I was instantly intriqued. Andris is a fellow member of HCRW (Heart of Carolina Romance Writers) my friend, and one of my critique partners.  So, after reading her blog, I invited her to blog here today and share what she knows about those wonderfully entertaining sentences.

But first, a little bit about Andris...

Andris Bear Bio:

Andris Bear blames  her mother for her fascination with books. Growing up in northern Indiana there wasn’t much to do and she often complained of boredom. Her mom handed her a book and told her to shush. She's been obsessed ever since.

Though Andris spent most of her time in between the pages, fantasizing of other worlds, she didn’t write her first book until she’d had three children—just in time to have not a moment to herself. In an attempt to keep her sanity, she writes. Her favorite stories contain strong heros and heroines, fighting an attraction stronger than both of them.


While pursuing publication, Andris writes delightful paranormal/urban fantasy romance with a touch of humor. Her current WIP involves sexy angels and demons and one kick-ass heroine.

Andris lives in eastern North Carolina with her husband and three children in chaotic bliss.

So, Andris, what is a paraprosdokian sentence and why do you like them so much?

I am in love with laughter—not my own. Other people’s. Crafting a sentence for another’s amusement brings me unparalleled joy and satisfaction. As a writer, I feel humor is one of the best ways to bond with your readers. It helps to break tension in a story and compels the reader to continue.

One of my favorite tools in my arsenal of buffoonery is a Paraprosdokian sentence. What’s that, you ask? A Paraprosdokian sentence is a figure of speech in which the latter part of the sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the listener or reader to reframe or reinterpret the first part.

“If all the girl’s who attended Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn’t be surprised.” – Dorothy Parker

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.” –Groucho Marx
 “She looks as though she’s been poured into her clothes and forgot to say ‘when’.” –P.G. Wodehouse.


“I like going to the park and watching the children run around because they don’t know I’m using blanks.” –Emo Phillips.
 “The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it’s still on the list.”


“I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.”


“You don’t need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.”


“You’re never too old to learn something stupid.”
 Delightful, aren’t they? So tell me, as readers, what do you adore in the stories you love? What brings you back for more? If you’re a fellow writer, how do you pull humor into your writing? Or whatever it is you use to brand your story and make it your own?

Fool For Romance Contest

Foor for Romance contest is now underway! For details on how to win a Kindle and other fabulous prizes, go to http://www.crystalrainlove.com/foolforromance.htm. Then visit the participating author's blog pages on their assigned days and follow each author's rules to become eligle to win.

I'm posting on Tuesday March 22nd and all you have to do to win is visit my blog on that day and post a comment. Then I'll draw a name on the 23rd and send it in to the contest coordinator. Easy. Huh?

Looking forward to the 22nd. Now, what should I blog about?